08 July 2008
i gt 1 stuff tat is troubling mi n 1 ting tat maks me both angry n sad.. both concerns specific ppl frm tat sec3 squad tat i hav respected..
i'll tok abt de ting tat mak mi angry 1st... de sec3 posted in de blog tat i send i love u to all his squadmates... i oni sent it to 3 person n i use de word lyk instead of love... do u knw tat tere's alot of difference between dis 2 words??... i reali dunno how to do deal with him... his my senior n instructor hu i respected.. but now with de words he uses on me, i dunno wad i m gonna treat him as in de future...
de nxt ting is a ting tat has troubled me for quite a few days... i couldnt get to sleep last nite becos of it too.. i act wan to settle de prob, clear my doubts n uncertainty ytd but i did nt do it in de end.. hais... now i dunno wad to do... i hav a lot of tings tat i wanted to tell him but i just dun hav de courage to tell him cos i fear de pain tat it might bring me... i knw tat i'm ugly n i dun hav de rite to lyk ani1.. but i just.. hais... i dunno wad i shld do n i oso dunno wad i m doing now... i feel tat i'm just making a fool out of myself but i just cant stop myself frm doing all those stuff... i tried telling him how i feel but i backed out last min again.. i'm a fool... i ask him q. tat i wanted ans on.. n i wad i get is: ...i dunno... i dunno!!!
i guess he took it as a joke ba...
dis ans just hurts me.. i dunno y... cld ani1 tell me wadd exactly i shld do??
act to be frank i'm nt sure whether i lyk him anot.. i feel tat i'm selfish cos frankly wad i wanted was someone hu will oways be tere for me... a shoulder n a person who i can tok to when i'm down... but i dunno whether i lyk tat guy ant.. den i go ask tat guy.. perhaps i dun hav de rite to ask him tat q. at all...
now... i still dunno de ans.. myself n his...
i wanted to forget him but i just cant get him off my mind...
i fear de pain tat he might bring mi but i still wanted his comfort...
i'm a fool.. a big fool but i'm scared.. reali scared..;(
只希望时间能够冲淡一切巴。。。
;
1:57 PM
huiyi..xp
